DOOM Movie Review

DOOM

Since the release of 2016 video game my love and appreciation of the DOOM franchise has grown considerably. I moved from one aborted play of DOOM 3 to having played 1, 2, 3, 2016, and Eternal. They’re all very violent affairs, as one man takes on the hordes of hell. Can a film really live up to that?

Nope!

There’s nothing wrong with DOOM as such; it’s a perfectly serviceable action film.

There is one thing which ages it though, and that’s Dwayne Johnson. Long before he tried to change the hierarchy of power in the DC universe, he was always called The Rock, had hair, and was a lot smaller. Even the most unflattering takes would have noted his charm back then. But he swears all THE FUCKING time. Like it’s a personality choice. This role undermines everything that makes him watchable. Maybe he was never that good?

Then there’s Karl Urban, who looks positively baby-faced after my recent watch of The Boys. He’s fine, clearly having improved on his accents since then, but my main takeaway regarding him is that he’d have made a decent Chris Redfield.

The best member of the cast though is Richard Brake, or as I know him, Joe Chill! I can never forget that he killed Bruce Wayne’s parents. He had a cracking 2005, with both this and Batman Begins being released. He brings some real personality to his role and is suitably annoying/lechy/creepy.

The story makes very little sense, deciding to eschew hell and demons in favour of extra chromosomes, and the affect it has on different people. It makes very little sense! At least it has the UAC in it, is on Mars, and does lean on some creature designs. It’s nonsense, and it isn’t entirely clear. Fortunately, it doesn’t matter! Ultimately it just leads to an FPS scene, and a big fight.

Speaking of the first-person scene, it’s cheesy but I do appreciate what they were going for. At least DOOM is trying to do something along the lines of the property it’s based on. They manage to slot in the BFG too, which is just as huge and silly as you’d expect.

DOOM is alright, despite me not saying many good things about it. It’s a bit of silliness with some big men and their big guns. I wish it lent more into the series it’s based on story wise, but ultimately it’s just alright.

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